1. So I have this thing with sharks.
2. It’s a hate/can’t avert my eyes from the train wreck kind of thing.
3. I am terrified of them. Like hard for me to relax in the ocean terrified.
4. But I love the ocean…love it.
5. I have nightmares about said sharks.
6. every month or so.
7. Last night even.
8. I was in some class and had to swim with a great white.
9. Cause that’s normal.
10. To properly swim with a great white (in said dream), one must snuggle up to the side of the shark. But not too close to the mouth/teeth/scary place.
11. So of course I cuddled right into that beast.
12. Because in my dreams, I’m a boss and swim with sharks.
13. It all started when I was 12.
14. My parents let me watch Jaws at my Aunt Caroline & Uncle Bill’s and I was never the same.
15. I was actually afraid to take a bath for a few months.
16. A. Bath.
17. Then years of monthly shark nightmares.
18. Thanks, guys. Thanks.
19. I made it out without getting eaten last night, though.
20. Always a plus.
21. Pretty sure I woke up in cold sweats.
23. But you wait til shark week comes on.
24. Be glued to that TV.