Disclaimer: This post brought to you by Shaunna, Kaitlyn, Amanda, and Adam. Opinions are ours only, and are not forced on you in any way. Ahem.
1. Mayo is, in fact, made by the devil. Or maybe his sister.
2. Men (mostly) should be taken at face value. They usually say what they mean. So if he’s staring off into space, well maybe he’s just staring. No reason to overanalyze all the time.
3. Women (mostly) overanalyze all things. So if she’s staring into space, might wanna start digging. She could be saving the planet, worrying about her kids, or picturing herself walking down the aisle. With you.
4. The best way to order a tea is half and half. Sweet tea is pretty flipping sweet.
5. Chocolate covered cherries are one of those foods you have to smack when eating. Vom.
6. It’s always going to rain when you are most excited about a sunny vacation.
7. It’s always going to rain directly after you wash your car.
8. A pulled chest muscle most definitely mimics a heart attack. Fun times.
9. It is so, so sad when your favorite book ends.
10. Cleaning the house with a small child at home is completely redundant.
11. Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups taste way better refrigerated.
12. Every time I open a store, there’s always a new leak right around the corner.
13. White Pants, Take a Chance.
14. Exercise does in fact make you a happier person. Unless you are actually in the act of exercising.
15. Every man looks a little better while smoking a pipe.
16. Homemade tacos are the best. Homemade pizza, too.
17. Orange juice tastes like vomit after you just brushed your teeth.
18. You CANNOT sneeze and keep your eyes open.
19. Binge watching Netflix dominates cable any day of the week.
20. Life is, in fact, not completely fair or easy. I’m sorry. We’re telling the truth today.
21. There is nothing better than a witty man. Or person in general. Take your pick.
22. Clowns are the scariest thing that walk the earth.
23. The only way to cure a song stuck in your head is to listen to it. Get it over with already.
24. It never fails that you will reply out loud to anybody sporting a bluetooth ear piece. Such a disappointment when they carry on with their conversation. Without you.
25. You should, most definitely, under any circumstance, never. say. never. Ever.