Here begins my journey….
“Love is built on two pillars that best define what it is. Those pillars are patience and kindness. All other characteristics of love are extensions of these two attributes. And that’s where your dare will begin. With patience….”
DARE :FOR THE NEXT DAY, RESOLVE TO DEMONSTRATE PATIENCE AND TO SAY NOTHING NEGATIVE TO YOUR SPOUSE AT ALL. IF THE TEMPTATION ARISES, CHOOSE NOT TO SAY ANYTHING. IT’S BETTER TO HOLD YOUR TONGUE THAN TO SAY SOMETHING YOU’LL REGRET.
It is only fitting that my first day of the Love Dare coincide with a week of utter, well, torture. Matt was gone all week and I decided to begin the morning after he came back. Again, I had little sleep so my patience was not at its height to begin with. It was very difficult not to say anthing negative when he went back to sleep, when he fell asleep on and off all day….I had been taking care of the kids all week solo! He was also so tired that he was not in the most patient of moods, either. These two facts did not make for an easy task. I had to bite my tongue so many times, and honestly, it is remarkable how much of our conversation is made up of criticism and correction and “telling.” Do this for a day and be shocked at yourself! It was funny because there were several times that I wanted to yell or just tell him, “Don’t do this…Please help with this…” and would stop myself. I would just look away, and he would just say, “What??” He could tell I was holding back and I think it totally stumped him.
What a day! I would say I’m happy it’s over, but you know what? In addition to each day’s dare, the first one holds. So when I report on today (kindness), I’ll also be holding to no negative words. Please, please say a prayer for me…
It’s simple logic that if I can actually stick to the dares, our marriage would have no choice other than to flourish. I had a friend email me after reading this and tell me that she had done the same thing with her husband, but she was enjoying it so much that she had to tell her husband so he could read it too. I’m with her….it’s really hard to do alone. We’ll see.
I haven’t completed today’s dare yet, and time’s running out, so I better get on it!